Romans 15:14 says:

And I myself also am persuaded of you, my brothers, that you also are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge, able also to counsel one another.

Colossians 1:27 and 28 says:

To whom God would make known what [is] the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory:

Whom we preach, [noutheteo] counseling every man, and teaching every man in all wisdom; that we may present every man mature in Christ Jesus:

Counseling what's that? You are likely to get several different answers to that question depending on whom you asked. Each one will probably answer based on their own experience and understanding of what counseling is.

It Starts in the Home

My earliest counseling experiences began right back in the home as a child. If I had a problem there was always somebody that I could go to, to discuss my problem.

I grew up in a home where I had good communication with my parents. My mom and dad were there whenever I had a problem. It was easy and a common thing for us to gather as a family in their bedroom.

The kids would all pile on the bed, and we would talk about things. We would talk about life and share our problems with one another.

I knew that if something went wrong in my life I didn't have to keep it to myself; I could discuss it. My parents may not have always had all the answers, but the channel was open for me to express some of the problems that I had.

At times even if I kept the problems inside, there would be another family member who would share their problem. As that person was ministered to, so I would learn from it. I would learn to open up my heart to those around me to share my needs and my problems.

I realized that as we go through life at times we need somebody else to see things from a different perspective. We need someone who does not see things the way we see it.

They should see it in a way that is unbiased by the way we are seeing it. And the best place for that to take place is in the home.

It should start with the parents, and the children should be able to come at any time to share what they are going through. They need someone who is more mature and has a greater knowledge to point them in the right direction.

Counseling Needs Change

As I grew up I came to a place in my spiritual experience where I needed counsel of a different kind. I had grown up and become my own person. I had individuated from my parents. I had become zealous for the Lord myself and wanted to go on for God and serve the Lord.

But then I came under a spiritual attack. It was the kind of attack that my parents could not handle. They tried to handle it. They prayed with me, comforted and encouraged me. They were there for me, but I couldn't break through the problem.

What was the problem? It was an intense fear that had gripped me - a fear so great that I was afraid to be alone even during the day, let alone at night. At night time, just going into my room alone to sleep was a terrifying experience.

My parents prayed with me. They even let me sleep in their room to try and overcome it, but I could not break free of this problem. I needed counsel of another sort, from somebody who knew a little bit more about these matters than what they did.

So the obvious person to go to was the pastor. He was the shepherd of the flock; the man of God who had all the Bible knowledge - we thought. He would be able to give more superior counsel and direction on how to overcome this problem that was so strong that I just couldn't break free of it.

So we went to see the pastor. He was actually more of an evangelist. He was very good at leading souls to the Lord. He could lead people to the Lord that you would never believe could ever be saved.

When we came to ask him about fear, the first thing he wanted to do was cast the demon of fear out of me. I objected to that because I was serving the Lord and I thought,

"How dare he suggest that I have a demon in me!"

Then he began to dig in the Word and came up with a brilliant revelation. He said,

"I've found a Scripture for you, Les. The Bible says that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

I said, "I memorized that one long ago. So what?"

"So you don't have to fear then."

"But I am fearing."

He said, "We'll lay hands on you and pray for you."

They had a special meeting in one of the homes and they said,

"Gather around Les. We're going to lay hands on him and cast out the spirit of fear."

When they had finished they said,

"Okay Les, go for a walk around the house in the dark, just to prove that the fear is gone."

So I went for a walk around the house in the dark and I was terrified all the way. Of course I couldn't tell them that when I got back. I was a grown man of about 21 years old already, and I was scared to walk around the house in the dark.

I said, "I'm fine. That was great; praise the Lord."

Correct Counsel

That night I had to go home alone and sleep in my bed again, but the fear was still there. The counseling did not help. I was not given sound counsel on how to overcome fear.

I continued to battle and struggle with this, until the Lord brought across my path a man of God who did know how to counsel. He was a man who knew the Word of God; who knew how to take the Scriptures and apply them to problems in life.

He sat me down and he gave me the Word. He said,

"Les, you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. Now let me show you the truth. Satan is trying to keep you from the truth. But when you get the truth into you and get it into your spirit, once it becomes a part of you, you will never fear again."

He took the Word and he showed me my position in Christ. He showed me from the Word that Satan is actually afraid of me; that I didn't need to be afraid of him. He took the Word and built it into me.

Then he gave me some homework to do. He gave me a whole lot of Scripture references and verses and said,

"I want you to go and memorize these. And as you lie in bed at night going to sleep I want you to quote those verses over and over again, one after the other.

"Quote the Scriptures again and again, and fall asleep quoting them. And every time the fear comes against you, take the Scripture and speak it out loud against the Devil."

I did my homework, and you know what? It worked. It did not work immediately. It was tough and a big battle. But for the first time I found I didn't have to lie there quivering in fear. I could do something about it. I could take the Word of God and apply it to my problem.

And although the fight was tough and I battled against that thing, it was a matter of time before eventually I had total victory. The Word of God had penetrated and become part of me, and I knew without a doubt that the truth had set me free.

There was no complicated counsel; just a man who knew how to take the Word of God and apply it to a problem. He knew how to teach me how to take the Word of God, apply it to my problem and to overcome by myself.

He prayed with me too and it was wonderful. He was even more anointed than the pastor. There was a powerful anointing of the Spirit of God.

While he was praying with me I could have faced the Devil and all his hordes. But when I went home I was alone again. And all I had in my hand, and all I had in my heart and in my mouth was the Word of God. That is how I overcame.

That was the greatest counseling need that I ever had. Up until that time I kind of boasted that I was pretty good and clued up in the Scriptures; that I didn't need anybody else to counsel me.

I knew all the answers. What could these preachers tell me? I had studied it better than them. There comes a time though when you need somebody to sit down and give you clear direction on how to overcome the problems.

Knowledge of Youth Conflicts

I grew up and got married. And I began to discover that there were other problems in life on leaving school and having to go out and face the world all on my own. I had to stand up and be the head of my own home, outside of my parents control and away from their protection.

Now new problems began to come into my life. How was I to overcome these problems? I dug into some books and began to study and pray to try and find answers to the problems.

Then somebody announced a special seminar that was being held in our city at that time. It was by a preacher of another denomination who I knew. I had worked with him at one time in a youth crusade that we had had.

He had gone overseas and attended a seminar by somebody called Bill Gothard, who at that time had a seminar called 'The Basic Youth Conflicts Seminar'. It dealt largely with the needs and problems that we face from our youth upwards.

This man had attended Bill Gothard's seminar, and had now come back to our country to travel around preaching and teaching something similar. Folks I knew were talking about this seminar and raving about it.

My first impression on hearing about it was that it was a load of nonsense. It sounded to me like ordinary Christian psychology. I could not understand how folks could make such a big fuss out of this. To me, they were getting away from the Word of God.

What do you think when somebody says,

"I've just been on a counseling course."

You will likely think,

"They went on one of those special courses where they teach you how to use psychology on people, and they call it counseling."

Although this was my attitude, it seemed that everyone in the church was going to this seminar. There were some good reports about it. And so as I was honest with myself and looked at my situation I realized,

"I have some problems that I can't solve. I have problems in my marriage that I can't solve."

So I went along with the crowd and enrolled for the seminar. It took about three or four days from Monday through to Friday, and I attended all the sessions.

An Eye Opener

The preacher began to share from the Word on basic problems that we all face. And as he started to share these things my heart began to burn within me. I thought,

"I've never heard this before. This is soundly based on the Scriptures. How come I've never heard my pastor preach or teach on how to take the Word of God and apply it to your problems in such a way? This isn't psychology. This is the Word."

It blew me away and transformed my life. It changed my teaching ministry that was just beginning to rise up then. And it brought changes to my marriage and to me personally.

I realized that so many Christians are missing out on sound truths that are available in the Word of God, because they have limited the Scriptures to the basic doctrines.

I had been studying and had bought all the theological books. I could tell you what I believed on the Godhead, water baptism and salvation, and the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I could teach you the doctrines of salvation, repentance from dead works, resurrection from the dead and the second coming of Christ.

I knew all of those things, but it wasn't helping me with my marital problems. It was not helping me in my financial problems. I needed somebody to take the Word and apply it practically to the needs and problems of my life. Now for the first time I found somebody who was starting to do that.

It was not being done in the church. It was being done in a seminar outside of the church. People from various different churches were being taught and instructed in how to live the spiritual life.

My pastor, who was meant to be the one to counsel me, didn't have a clue. I had to go somewhere else to get counsel.

Christian Psychology

A little later somebody came into town who was teaching something very similar to Bill Gothard's seminar, and the moment I saw it advertised I perked up. I had begun to read a lot of books on counseling and found that there were not too many books on Christian counseling.

One of the most popular writers I found at that time was a man by the name of Clyde Narramore. He called himself a Christian psychologist.

He wrote good stuff which was very sound, but it was from a psychological viewpoint. This was my first real exposure to psychology. I had been arrogant about psychology before, but now I thought,

"Let me have a look at this. Maybe there are a few things there that we can use in a Christian context."

So I read Clyde Narramore, and he had some good sound basic psychological principles, but they did not need the Word. Sure he was a Christian and he spoke in a Christian context, but he didn't use the Bible as the basis for his teaching.

I remember reading a statement that he made in one of his books. He said to somebody,

"You know, we psychologists find it very easy to tell people where their problems come from. But showing them how to solve their problems is another story."

That is as far as psychology goes. It is easy to expose the problem. Hey, we are all psychologists. Just pull anybody out and the whole world will tell him what his problem is. We all know what everybody else's problem is. We say,

"Your problem is you're too arrogant. Your problem is this; your problem is that."

We think we are all counselors.

This new group had gone to visit Bill Gothard and studied with him for a while and picked up all of his teachings. Then they went to visit Clyde Narramore for a while, and they picked up all of his teachings. Now they tried to join the two together in a new seminar.

There was some good stuff there. It made interesting reading. The person who taught it was anointed. He was Spirit-filled and he ministered very well. He dropped a few extra pieces of the puzzle into place for me.

But I saw a discrepancy appearing between the Word of God and the teachings of psychology. They started to introduce concepts, such as loving yourself like psychology teaches, and they tried to baptize it with Scripture. But I felt that something was still missing.

Watchman Nee

By that time I had learned to study by myself and read lots of books. I had begun to read books by a Chinaman named Nee Tosheng, commonly known as Watchman Nee. He had written some books, and many more had been created from the live teachings he gave while he was alive.

By this time he was dead and gone. He died a martyr in a Chinese jail for his stand and his faith in the Lord, but oh what a man of God. What a teacher of the Word. He was a man who could take the Scriptures and apply them practically.

I picked up his book entitled 'The Normal Christian Life' and I found out that the Christian life that he was speaking about was anything but normal.

There were a lot of books, in which he presented a whole range of teachings. One of the most popular series was the 'Normal...' series. There were titles like, 'The Normal Christian Church Life' and 'The Normal Christian Prayer Life'.

To me however there was nothing normal about what he described. Often I didn't even understand what he was talking about until I lived and experienced it. But he was correct in calling this normal. That is what the normal Christian life should be like.

His teachings opened up vistas of understanding and knowledge to me that I had never seen before. And yet this man did not believe in the Baptism of the Spirit the way we believe it. He did not speak in tongues and he didn't move in the Gifts of the Spirit.

He knew an experience of God that would bring you to a place of sanctification to deal with the sin in your life. But he knew nothing about moving in the power of God by the Holy Spirit, the way we teach it in the Charismatic and Pentecostal environment.

Nevertheless, there was a depth of knowledge in the man that I have never seen amongst the Pentecostals.

Jay Adams

When I attended that Basic Youth Conflicts Seminar, the man who was teaching it had studied a little bit beyond Bill Gothard. He had done his homework, and he kept quoting some guy by the name of Jay Adams. I had never heard of this man. Who was he?

By the time I was finished the Seminar I had to go and find out who this person was, that he kept quoting from. He seemed to be quoting more from Jay Adams at times than he was from Bill Gothard.

So I went out and bought one of the books that he had recommended. It was a book called 'Competent to Counsel' by Jay Adams.

I thought he must be a mighty man of God. But when I got the book and read it, I discovered that he was a Presbyterian minister who did not believe in the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. Presbyterian is about as traditional as you can get.

He had formulated a whole revolution in counseling. The man was a qualified psychiatrist, but he explained why psychiatry was wrong. He exposed all the fallacy in psychology and psychiatry and got back to the Word.

His premise was that you could take the Word and use nothing else. That is all you needed to counsel.

He had a counseling center where people were being set free of things such schizophrenia and other major problems. And he was using the Word alone to set people free.

My bookshop account was my biggest expense in those days. I was buying books by Watchman Nee and Jay Adams. And if a new book came out by one of those authors I would buy it without even checking it.  I wanted everything they wrote.

It was so bad that when a book was published that had Jay Adams' name on it, I would buy it even if he did not write it. Sometimes he was just the Editor-in-Chief and using his name to show his approval of it.

As I looked at these men who had begun to mold my life and my thinking, I realized there was still a dimension that was lacking.

Jay Adams did not even teach that man is a tripartite being. He believed that the spirit and soul are one and that there is no difference between spirit and soul. As a result he has limited the whole understanding of the spiritual realm.

Watchman Nee, by leaving out the Gifts of the Spirit, limited the whole spiritual dimension. I needed somebody to fill that gap, and the Lord brought me such a person as I discovered a new book.

John Sandford

This book was called the Elijah Task, and it was written by a man by the name of John Sandford. I discovered that he had written books on inner healing and that he was one of the pioneers of inner healing.

This is why it had taken me so long to discover him. I used to preach against inner healing until the Lord performed such a healing on me. Then I had to sit up and take notice.

I discovered books by John Sandford entitled 'Transformation of the Inner Man', 'Healing the Wounded Spirit', and the 'Christian Family'. Most of these were written by him and his wife Paula Sandford.

As I picked up those books and began to read them, I began to have a similar experience to what I had when I first read Watchman Nee. I thought,

"What is this man talking about? I don't understand what he is talking about at all. I've never heard these things before. How come these things are not being preached and taught in the church?"

I held this thick book in my hands, but I couldn't even get past the first chapter. I choked on it because I had not lived it.

So the book lay there by my bedside, and every now and then when I reached a crisis in my life, I would pick it up and start to browse through it. I would pick it up and read a section or a chapter at a time, and God would lead me to read the right chapter at the right time.

Often the words just jumped out of the pages and I thought,

"Wow, I've never seen that before. I didn't know that was possible. So that's what has been happening here."

John was a Spirit-filled man of God who moved in the Prophetic Ministry. The Elijah Task is the only book on the Prophetic Ministry I have ever studied, and one of the soundest teachings on the subject.  I later produced my own teachings which included some of the principles I learned there.

So I had three main mentors in my spiritual life : Watchman Nee, Jay Adams and John Sandford. And I daresay, if you put those three men together in a discussion they probably would have argued with each other.

Their teachings were so different, and yet each of them filled a gap in my understanding of how to take the Word of God and apply it to your spiritual life in a practical way.

You may be asking,

"What does all of this have to do with counseling?"

It is as a result of the teachings of these people that I can show you what counseling really is. This is a huge subject and I am only introducing it here. But in the rest of this book I am going to cover the subject in some detail.

You will learn how to take the Word of God and apply it to the problems in peoples' lives. By the time you are finished, you will have a whole different viewpoint on what you thought counseling was.